Dog for Sale

Wanna buy a Dog


As the storm howls relentlessly, my windows shake in fear, and
snow fills in my driveway, I contemplate the things I enjoy about
a winters’ storm. The sounds are what I love best. Last night,
with my window ajar, I listened as the wind whipped around the
half-house. Of course I could only hear the wind on my side of
the half-house, but it was loud and wild. As it lulled me to sleep,
the hound sauntered down the hall as his nails clicked on the
hardwood. Soon he jumped onto the bed and buried deep
beneath the blanket. Soon I awoke, not to the soothing sounds of
the winds but the snorting and choking of the Fraz as he found it
difficult to breathe. That’s when I should have smothered him.
Damn dog, I’m goin’ buy me a turtle.
Now the morning light appears and the sounds are inescapable.
The storm is fierce and I jump to look outside. Of course the
windows are blocked with snow and seeing is difficult but my
tactile faculties are working as I walk into a puddle on the floor
where some had landed. Damn snow. Bloody storm.
Now my precious canine wants to take his morning
constitutional. So I lug on my knee high boots, cap, gloves, and
coat to brace myself against elements. I open the door and the
dog refuses to step outside. Damn dog. I pick up the damn dog
and carry him outside and he runs back into the house. Damn
dog. I pick him up again and he wiggles and falls to the floor.
Now I have to chase him down the hall. I win! I pick him up and
outside we go. This time I close the door and put him on the one
patch of frozen earth that is not covered in snow. He high-tails it
back to the step. He begins to shiver and look at me. Well look
in my direction as he sees nothing. I am determined this
creature is going to pee or we will both be found frozen in the
yard of the half-house on Rosemount. I pick him up again and
put him back on the same spot where he squats like a little girl
and has the shortest pee on record and then literately jumpsfrom the patch of earth to the door.

Now he is curled up on the sofa like the King of Canines. My day
promises to be filled with unpleasant aromas coming from the
Damn dog as he will not stay outside long enough to do his
business. I think gold fish are pretty. Kids had hamsters once; I
will never go down that road again.
So at least three more times during this storm I will dress in my
combat outfit, not to beat the storm but to wrestle with 26
pounds of my Fair-weather Dog! So how’s your day so far???